Cycle 5-CD8

I'm getting anxious to have my ultrasound on Wednesday at 10:00 a.m. I'm really praying that I have more than one mature follicle.

I ordered my #38 swimmers this morning from MWSB. Joanne made a point to tell me that #44 has a much higher success rate. Number 38 was my original pick but has not been available for the past four months. This month there is one vial available of #38 so I want to give him a try.

Today I called the RE's office in Wichita to schedule an appointment. I didn't realize that it would be this difficult to "schedule" the appointment. They are going to send me out a packet of papers and when I have everything completed I send the packet back. If I'm accepted they will call to schedule an appointment. Good thing I started this process early!

Cycel 5-CD 3

I have been doing some research on adding FSH injectables to my Femara cycle. I found a protocol that was Femara cycle days 3-7 and 2 amps of FSH on cycle days 9 & 11. At first Dr. Marshal my OBGYN was not responsive and said in the past he has used FSH but no longer uses it in his practice. After talking to him more and showing what I had printed off the web and had sone a lot of research he said he would consider it if I could find some additional information.

After doing more research I have decided to do 2 more cycles of Femara and then make an appointment to see the reproductive endocrinologist in Wichita if I have not conceived. I have done 2 unmediated cycles using donor sperm and 2 cycles using 2.5 mg Femara with donor sperm. This cycle I'm using 5.0 mg of Femara to see if it will increase the number of follicles. While doing research I found statics of using 2.5 vs. 5.0 mg of Femara. With 2.5 mg you have a 1.2% chance of twins and a 38% chance using 5.0 mg. At this point I would LOVE to have twins and be done with the entire infertility phase of my life. My Dad is a twin and my Mom's Dad is a twin so I would love to follow family tradition. You would think with that family history and add in fertility drugs I would have a chance at ONE baby.

It just amazes me that women who have had a child have absolutely no idea how babies are made and what a complex process it is to actually conceive. My hairdresser, a mother of a 7 month old , made the comment that since I am taking fertility medication and using donor sperm that I should just use all of the sperm and eggs at the same time and just make lots of babies. Hummm.....I guess people just assume that when your doing "infertility treatments" that you are doing In-Vitro & can pick and choose how many eggs you want to fertilize. I have kind of gotten to the point that I don't want to discuss it because it seems like nobody has a clue. I get more comfort and guidance form Internet message boards where I can communicate with others in the same position.

Cycle 5- CD 1

Aunt Flo showed today! I possibly had the worst PMS symptoms this month that I have ever had so it was no surprise that she showed. I'm disappointed as always but I'm not giving up yet.

Back to the real world

Our vacation to Branson, MO was wonderful. We were ready to get back to our own bed and home but neither of us were ready to return to work.

My Family

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Cycle 4- 4 dpiui

Ahhhhhh...I'm on vacation for the next week in Branson, MO!

I'm not sure what's going on with my body anymore. Yesterday I had the worst bra day of my life! I have been wearing the same size/style of bras (VS BBV) forever but the last couple of days they are killing me! I got home from work last night and the very fist thing I did was take the damn thing off. I don't want to let myself play mind games that I might be pregnant that this could possibly be a "symptom" but it's so hard when you psychoanalyze every twinge, gas pain, perky nipple...etc!

Cycle 4 - CD 14 Insemination Day!

All went well for Cycle 4 insemination. It's becoming so routine but not a routine that I want to have to continue forever....I want a baby damn it!

Not much else happening, the time change is kicking my butt as it always does.

Cycle 4- CD 13 Positive OPK

I have to say I absolutely hate the way I feel after HCG injections, it makes me mean. I had been kind of grumpy all day yesterday but I kind of flipped out last night. I totally picked a fight with Gary about nothing at all. I feel bad this morning for being so petty. Luckily he is the best guy on the plant and realized that I was under the influence of HCG.

Since we have been first talking about me getting pregnant he has been adamant that he did not want to be in the delivery room when our baby is born. He finally told me last night he passed out when his daughter was born and that is the reason he doesn't want to be there. That was 26 year ago so it must have been really bad. I suppose all I can do it educate ourselves and if he is unable to be there for that moment I will have to figure something else out.

I finally seen a smiley face on a OPK today. I don't know if the HCG injection makes the OPK positive but it was nice to see it!

I'm feeling pretty confident this cycle. The timing just feels right this month. Gary and I are going on vacation to Branson, MO this Friday and I can't wait, we are both in desperate need for some time away. Gary has National Guard dills Friday night, Saturday and Sunday so I will have some time to go exploring that part of the state and have some "me" time. Saturday I am driving to Carthage, MO to visit the Precious Moments Chapel and then Sunday night we will drive to Branson.

Cycle 4-CD 12

Tonight at 10:00 I had to do my HCG injection. I was totally fretting giving it to myself & luckily my neighbor who is an RN was home and she gave it to me. This morning I took a OPK and it was negative.